hot dogs, birthday cake and an ugly awning

Hot dogs, birthday cake and an ugly awning: This is what I remember about the weekend:

The hot dog part of my night started when we went to a house warming party being thrown by our neighbor across the street. The party started early around 6 which is early for a party, but understandably so, due to the diversity of our neighbors, which were the primary people invited to this party. A melting pot, it was. 8 months to 70 year olds and everything in between. The gays were well represented despite the undoubtedly lesbian neighbor who showed up with her husband.? Also well represented were the young, hip and fashionable -and thanks to those who fell into this category for balancing out the crowd to keep it from feeling like awkward family reunion. I had some margaritas and a hot dog - everything else was unrecognizable or had onions. We might have stayed longer if it hadn't been for party #2 and married lesbian who really wanted me to sit down next to her and kept making weird eye contact with me.?

Party #2: Enter birthday cake... Oh no, not just birthday cake, but also a big bowl of m&m's, not 1 but 2 trays of cookies, chex mix, the obligatory bowl of nuts and a tray of doughnuts, yes doughnuts. So, here I am 30 years old and unsure of how to act, standing before a buffet of junk food. Is it kosher to mix peanut butter cookies with red wine? Do m&m's and shots of tequila really go together? After enough time and drinks had passed I didn't care anymore, and yes I even ate a half of a doughnut. If it had not been for the video slideshow from last year's party (which we also attended) mixed in with the occasional pictures of naked men, I might not have realized I was not at a child's birthday party, but rather a party for a forty something year old gay pilot.

The Ugly Awning: I spent the next day recovering from all the alcohol and junk food I had consumed. It was a good thing the cops showed up when they did or I might have been in worse shape. And, thank god for that hot dog, the only "real" food I got to eat all day. As I was lying on the couch watching a movie (o.k. sleeping) I remembered that it was Ugly Awning day. My ambitious partner had intended on removing the last bit of granny from our house, the ugly awning. With a little help from some friends we had the grannny gone in no time.